When is it okay to be okay? When is it not okay to be not okay?
This question from the recently concluded Binibining Pilipinas 2021 made netizens scramble on social media. Beyond the pageant, the question took a life of its own as it started conversations. There had been many opinions, realizations, and personal experiences shared.
Pageant followers and casual viewers alike were engaged in the conversation as the question served as a reality check. For some, it opened up a part of themselves they have failed or refused to acknowledge before.
As a kid, answering questions like “are you okay?” or “how are you” seems simple. We say yes as a genuine answer. Now, as adults, we often reply, “I’m fine—there’s nothing to worry about,” just to escape this conversation. Most of the time, we feel like our emotions are too complex to be put into words.
As adults, we like to think of ourselves as resilient. Whenever we are in pain or physically ill, we always trust that medicine will make us better. When we get disappointed, we move forward headstrong. But have we ever checked our emotions? Are we still okay? When is it okay not to be okay?
When is it okay not to be okay?
Even though we think of ourselves as strong individuals, there are times when we should allow ourselves to feel things. Sometimes, it feels more cathartic to let our guards down.
It is okay to feel weak.
We can never be strong all the time, and that’s alright. We all have our limits, and our limitations are all different. We can be tired. We are just humans. Once you acknowledge your weakness, you will appreciate how strong you are and how strong you can be. Don’t rush the need to be strong. It might take time, but we will surely get there. You will surely get there.
It is okay to get frustrated.
Getting frustrated is inevitable, especially when all our plans are not happening according to our expectations. We feel like nothing good is happening around us. Someone or something has pulled off all our serotonin. What to do when you feel it? Breathe in and breath out. Go back to the roots of your emotions. Is it worth your frustration? From there, slowly figure out how you can address the situation.
It is okay to feel pain.
It is okay to get hurt and to recognize pain. It is also inevitable. You may feel hurt from a frustrating situation or from goals not being met. While pain does not feel good, it is something we have to live with. In this circumstance, embrace the pain till it hurts no more. You do not need to justify your hurt to anybody.
It is okay to cry.
Crying is therapy. It washes our eyes and releases the sting in our hearts. Next time you feel the urge to cry, do not control your tears. Let your heart pour out.
When is it not okay not to be okay?
There are therapeutic practices, and there are also toxic habits that you must learn to let go of.
It is not okay to not ask for help.
Know that you always have someone to help you or talk to. You always have that one person who is ready to back you up. It’s that someone who will always wait for you to open up.
It may be your mom, your dad, your sister, your brother, your friend, or your other half. Do not suppress nor hide it. Don’t face it alone. Don’t ignore it. Seek help, especially if it drowns you.
It is not okay if your problems affect you greatly and you are stagnant.
While it is okay to be disappointed, learn to not be stuck in your problems, worries, or anxieties. Don’t dwell on things you have no control over. There are things that you cannot influence whether you did less or more.
You can’t change the past or your burdens, but you always have the power over your present and future. Learn to focus on the things you can control. If it helps, make a gratitude list to divert your attention. If it feels like a war, remember that you can always choose your battle.
It is not okay when your body says so.
We can convince our mind and heart that we are okay but never our body. Rest if you need it badly. Remember, we cannot exchange our bodies for a better one.
Tiring your body out to be productive would do you more bad than good in the long run. You can never think clearly if you lack sleep or you always skip your meal. Staying fit and healthy is always important.
It is not okay to always compare.
The online world opens a lot of doors, and it surely makes our lives easier. But having easy access to everything also has its disadvantages. Now, it is much easier to see what you are missing out on.
It is easier to compare yourself with anybody, especially on social media. Whenever we open our feeds, they are full of life events and milestones we also wish we experience. Occasionally we feel like we are left behind.
But your pace is different from everybody else. You do not live the same experiences. You face different problems, you have different levels of privileges, and you have unique goals.
Or some of us probably are still figuring out what we want in life, and that’s okay. What’s not okay is to keep on comparing your accomplishment to someone else’s achievement. It will just be a distraction to your goal and a disservice to yourself.
You are rushing to be in a relationship because you are the only single now in your group. That’s not okay.
You are starving yourself because you feel like you are gaining a lot of weight lately? That’s less healthy than the food you’re holding yourself from.
In the end, only you know when things feel okay and not okay. What’s important is that you learn to master doing what makes you feel good and avoid those that disrupt your peace.
Learn to be kinder to yourself so that you may achieve your goals and dreams. Check out more inspirational content from our blog page or visit Camella’s house and lot offerings to achieve your dream lifestyle.